02
Oct
07

How ya doing ?! ;)

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How ya doing?! 😉

Anyone who watches Friends must be a big fan of Joey and would be quite familiar with this pick up line. Its Joey’s favorite and as a matter of fact his only pick up line. And you know the best part it always works, almost 95% of the time. But it needs somebody like Joey to pull it off. Just imagine if Maulana Fazal Ur Rehman tries this line on any hottie. The consequences would be so darn funny.

So it’s not the pickup line itself which has all the magic. It’s the guy who utters those lines. Eh? But have you ever wondered why only men feel the need of using a pickup line. I never heard a woman complaining about how difficult is to pick man. They always grumble about how to choose the right guy. In fact how to get Mr. right? That proves the fact that getting a man has never been an issue for post world war women. It’s a guy headache. We need pickup lines, months of homework and money to get the things done. Unlike women they just have to be “themselves”.

You know guys what is our biggest problem when it comes to picking up women or pickup lines in particular. We go with the clichés, the same old formula’s and lines. Every guy in his life and I really mean when I say this that every guy in his life for once, (when ever) went up to a girl. The first words that he uttered were; ‘would you like to be my friend’ and for Pakistani guys it would be ‘Would you like to have friendship with me!’ (or something similar)how stupid is that 😛 Just imagine how it sounds to a girl who never met or seen you in her entire life is enforced to have “Friendship with you!”. Guys at my school, high school, university committed the same mistake again and again i.e. telling the girl that they wanted to have friendship with her or something equally stoopid . But the message was the same. Few months ago a friend did the most stupid thing on the face of the earth. He went up to a girl and…

Stupid Friend: Excuse me!

Poor Girl: Yes?!

SF: I would like to tell you something in private (as she was with her gang )

PG: No! Just tell me what do you want? (she snapped)

SF who was already confused lost what he called his mind and uttered: You know what a young man wants with a girl 🙂

PG: WTF? @#$%@#$^$%&%^&$#%#$%$^$%&%^&^&%^&%$^56&%^&%^&

She went on and on for five minutes and my stupid friend was humiliated more then the Pakistani team when they lost to Ireland in WC2007.

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But these kinds of guys are better then the ones who try other ways to get up to a girl. The second kind are real jerks and use means like whistling, hooting, passing some really dim-witted and corney remarks and proudly believe that they are doing some real big favor to the world. I asked one jerk that what the f#$% he was thinking when he passed a nasty remark on that “Gurl”. His reply was;

Jerk: Keeping it real man 😀

Yes 😛 kepping it real stupid!

 

You know when I hit teenage Shahrukh Khan was my role model. Not Quaid-e-Azam Mohammed Ali Jinnah, Gandhi or Dr. Abdul Qadeer but Shahrukh Khan. Why? Because he was so damn good with women (in the movies) that he acted. A real charmer, like they have George Clooney in Hollywood. Not Salman Khan because all he ever did to charm women was stripping. Now we can’t do that in the real world. For instance if I met some hottie at Pizza Hut I wont take shirt off to impress her. But he can 😛 so the guy that we could (kind of) relate to is Sharukh Khan. Skinny, dark, short but damn is he awesome with women in all the movies.

For example;

1) In Dil wale; Kajol was a serious and obedient daughter that was engaged to a desi guy in India and was about to marry her. But our good old SRK charmed her and won her after some beating. Imagine doing that in the real world 😛

2) SRK again in Kuch Kuch hota hai, a single dad dumbed Kajol for Rani before his own marriage was able to lure her on the day when she was getting married. Poor Salman was so depressed that he forgot to take his shirt off to balance things out. Imagine pulling off what SRK did, in the real world 😛

3) Madhuri in Dil to Pagal Hai was getting married to her best friend Akshay but SRK like always comes form nowhere and the ending was so predictable. Can you do it? 😛

I think they should tell the stupid male audience when the film ends that “Don’t you freaking try this at home :P” like they tell you in WWE. So don’t try the SRK ways at home, school, college, workplace, streets etc. If SRK was this good in the real life he would not have been married to the same woman for 10 or more years 😛 hence proved these things dont work in the real world.

So what did we learn today? We learned that picking up women is one of the most difficult tasks on the planet. So if you accidentally or luckily have a lady in your life, then try to stick onto her because you wont like to go on and start from the very beginning, again 😛 and the single fellas out there when you are flirtng don’t come straight to the point and don’t be stooopid enough to tell the truth. She don’t like to hear what you want, she likes to hear, what she likes to hear 🙂

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22 Responses to “How ya doing ?! ;)”


  1. 1 lubz
    October 2, 2007 at 4:35 am

    “She likes to hear, what she likes to hear”
    😀
    I must say, you’re understanding pcyche of a girl very well now! 🙂
    All the more reason for your blog to be more popular among the female bloggers 🙂
    And why would girls need a pick up line when same effect could be achieved by drop of a napkin or batting eye lashes with a hint of smile 😉

  2. October 2, 2007 at 7:18 am

    OMG, I have like a gazillion examples of “I would like to friendship you.” I mean like what up with those desi guys, many a times they have the most messed up ideas about women. I say, the first that they need to do is to respect women as human beings.

  3. October 2, 2007 at 9:10 am

    @ Lubz

    thnx 🙂 but i think more men read my blog in comparison. The females are kind enuff to comment 😛 😉

    @ Aliana

    I am sure you do! but i dont think you can only blame men for being disrespectful or vulgar all the time. I am sure you will agree that some women actually believe that men are just idiots and they can manipulate them the way they want. Some years back I officially visited an all girls college and guess what I was treated the same way when a girl visits an all boys college 😛

    Lubz and Aliana thnx for the comments

  4. October 2, 2007 at 9:56 am

    hey gd one!! very true ur gurls dnt need a pickup line as usually guys r hooked up wn thy see a bful gurl so half of da job is dnt on da gurls side lolx or observation tu achee honee he ha as u have n ample experience 😉 rite y??

  5. October 2, 2007 at 10:02 am

    As for SRK is concern dnt try these tips as da concequences r mentioned up thr >>. if ul be genuine thrs a g8 possibility of gettin a guls whome u really want sahi??

  6. October 2, 2007 at 2:57 pm

    Thanx becca, badaway which experience are u talking abt 😉 I think following ur tips will help both men and women as far as social issues are concerned as ur a big ‘ GYAANII’ (o WISE ONE) 🙂

  7. October 2, 2007 at 8:03 pm

    actually the idea is to make her smile/laugh/giggle…
    and thats always the best way to make new friends

  8. October 3, 2007 at 9:33 am

    thnx for da title Y……. n u surley kno wat experience m talkin abt lolzz….

  9. October 3, 2007 at 8:05 pm

    I like Friends but ‘Chandeler’ is my favourite from Friends.
    Instead of’ Maulana Fazal Ur Rehman’ shouldn’t you mention Sartaz Aziz. He was in the news for trying to charm one Condoliza Rice a few months back :)).
    SRK mentioned once that Gauri would kick me out of the house if I tried to charm her with my filmi dialogues.
    In real life SRK charmed Gauri’s family as he did in DDLJ.
    //We learned that picking up women is one of the most difficult tasks on the planet. So if you accidentally or luckily have a lady in your life, then try to stick onto her because you wont like to go on and start from the very beginning, again 😛 and the single fellas out there when you are flirtng don’t come straight to the point and don’t be stooopid enough tell the truth. She don’t like to hear what you want, she likes to hear, what she likes to hear :)// You got it right in the end.

  10. October 4, 2007 at 7:43 am

    @ Ankur

    You know it all 😛 😉

    @ becca 😉

    @ Prerna

    Mathew Perry surely did a wonderful job with his character Chandler Bing 😀

    SRK rocks! He got more fans in this part of the border i tell you 🙂 Actually we have a thing for Delhi-ites for example 2 out of three Presidential candidates open their eyes in your city.

  11. October 4, 2007 at 10:49 am

    I know that SRK is popular in Pakistan. I remember watching a programme long time back anchored by Naem Bokhari( Chief Justice of Pakistan fame). There was a hair stylist complaining that guys come to him to get SRK look. He said how can I change their faces.

  12. October 5, 2007 at 12:47 am

    LOL you’re an amazing humourous writer masha’allah! I’ve never laughed like I did with this post, great times…

    I totally see your point! Did you know there are now Islamic pick up lines that people use on religious girls? Google it, lol, it’s hillarious what people think up.

    Take care 😀

  13. October 5, 2007 at 8:39 am

    @ Pr3rna

    I remember that program. Man that aired ages ago, its nice to know that people in India follow Pakistani media as well.

    @Unique Muslimah

    Welcom to Ronin 🙂

    Its nice to know that I can still make some people smile. And yes I read some of the lines used ( on and by) religious women; i guess on Aliana blog. That was real wicked! 😉

  14. October 5, 2007 at 9:18 am

    Unfortunately not many people in India follow Pakistani TV. I love your programs becuase of the language and the anchors. Anwar Maqsud is my favourite. Hamare Lucknow ke hain :)).Earlier we used to have PTV but now with the DTH system in place we don’t get it. Ary was broadcast here earlier but after it became a pay channel we don’t get it any more. I miss it although.

  15. October 5, 2007 at 9:58 am

    Interesting 🙂

    Aren’t you from DELHI ? I thought the Delhi/ Lucknow war is not ova yet. Like the one the poets use to had during Ghalib’s era.

  16. October 5, 2007 at 11:13 am

    Good one Ammar !
    I like Joey the guy.
    Girls and guys have similar nature…they don’t go for someone who comes after them.
    In Pakistan / India guys go after girls while in the west it seems opposite.
    Its hard to think of good pickup lines that are practical in our culture..so we do come up with ‘friendship’ line thinking that we can upgrade it later :-P. Guys forget that famous line ” mein tou tumhein doust samahtee thee ( I thought of you as a friend )”….as ‘ shadi sirf suhman sey karnee hai (she would only marry an enemy ). 😛

    In old days lines used to be ” tumharey haathon pey mehndi acchi lagtee hai ( Your hands look good with henna)” and the girls response used to be ” Ammaaaaaan!!!!!” ( Mom!! ) 😀

    Muslim pickup lines…I have observed that in the west that every muslimah is ‘sister’ so imagine the guy goes and proposes ” Behn jee, mujh sey shadi karein gee ( sister, will you marry me )” and she responds ” lekin yeh behnoyee bhi jahez mein aayeingey ( your brother in law too will come in dowry )” 😀

    I remember one of my friends went to the most beautiful girl ( Irish ) in the hall and said ” you must be from heavens as I have never seen this kind of beauty on earth ” …we laugh but it does work!

    For me, I think the easiest pickup line is ” Hi….I don’t know of any good pickup lines so thought why not start with hi ” 😀

    As for SRK tactics …are ‘ don’t try at home ‘ kind. But its the bad guys who are more interesting to girls….if they want good guys, they would go straight to where they are in abundance… in every masjid, mandir and church etc 😀

    Liked your blog and post..Good work!.

  17. October 6, 2007 at 4:38 pm

    Welcome Zios I like your blog as well 🙂

    You raised some very interesting and valid points. Girls for sure like the bad guys! 😛

    and the good ones in churches, temples and mosques are praying to get what the bad guys have 😉

  18. October 8, 2007 at 3:42 pm

    Man,

    You reminded me of Friends… I will re-watch all the seasons of it, Its real fun man…

  19. October 9, 2007 at 9:55 am

    I live in Delhi but my forefathers are from UP so I can lay claim on both the cities. Do you watch Friends on ‘Star World’ and ‘Zee Cafe’ or you have to buy DVD’s ?

  20. October 9, 2007 at 4:51 pm

    i watch reruns on both STAR WORLD and on ma DVD player. there is a friend of mine whose quite mullah. he didnt use to watch TV at all. I made him watch THE SIMPSONS following the 70’s SHOW and now he watches FRIENDS 😀

  21. 21 K
    January 22, 2010 at 11:23 am

    Hmm so u practice what u preach? Lol

  22. April 29, 2013 at 8:59 am

    I’m really enjoying the theme/design of your website. Do you ever run into any browser compatibility problems? A small number of my blog readers have complained about my website not operating correctly in Explorer but looks great in Firefox. Do you have any ideas to help fix this issue?


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R O N I N

A web-blog by another wanna be writer who thinks he can write

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