09
Nov
07

Growing old is mandatory, but growing up?

I remember when I was a kid and all I ever wanted to be was a grown up. Because for me growing up was so freaking cool; grownups can drive, they can smoke that thing call cigarette or what ever and a cool smoky ring comes out of ones mouth. I use to watch my dad smoking and one day when he accidentally threw that thing on the floor, I picked it up and took a puff. The result was ‘cough! cough! cough! cough! cough! cough! cough! cough! cough! cough! cough! cough! cough!….” I never tried that shit since then 😛

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But all I wanted was to grow up asap. One more edge that grownups had on kids was hooking up with apposite gender. Back then girls in my class use to be so irritating and bitchy, the world hasn’t changed much but at that time girls use to be anything but nice. They were some crazy ass rude bitches 😛 I used to get all suspicious if any girl in my class or neighbor hood sounded polite. After several years the myth was finally revealed to me when I was told that if a girl in her early teens acts extremely rude then chances are that she actually likes you or had a crush on you (of some sort).

  Ok, good! 😛 And men are blamed for not understanding women. But to be a grown up is the aim of every boy, you know what else is common among young boys they have secret crushes on their hot teachers. Secret nah! Guys never have secret crushes or affairs until they are married or are in a serious relationship. They tell everyone about their crushes and affairs before that. Even if you meet one idiot for the first time and catch him starring some hot girl. He will have this devil look in his eyes and bark; ‘that hot piece of ass is your bhabi (brother’s wife).’ Yeah rite, that poor girl had no clue that you even exist, you idiot. Despite the fact that you guys were class mates for the past seven years.  But when we are kids, we have crushes on our hot teachers. That teacher appears like an angel send straight from heaven; beautiful smile, nice long locks, sexy voice. A guy in his 3rd grade had a crush on his teacher.So he  waited and waited and waited. His dreams were shattered when he hit 17 and  decided to go up to her, reason; that lady was all fat 😛

‘I first thought that Adnan Sami had her for breakfast or something. But it was her alright‘ he told me  

 So moral of the story is that growing old is not as much fun as it appears when you are kids, you don’t get much holidays from your work place, no summer vacations, no nothing. Public holidays had such significance in my life when I was in school, even if I had no clue what that holiday was about. Strikes were like bonuses. I used to ask my friend what’s the strike about.

And he used to narrate this long tale to me;  

well dude, some guy had an old tire and thought to make use of it, so he brainstormed this important issue with his buddies and they came up with this brilliant plan of setting it on fire.  

Burning tire, dats kewl 😀 ’

  

then one genius came up with this idea of tossing that tire on the road and throw stones on the cars by passing.’

  

‘Man you have some crazy fun when you grow old, eh? 😀 ’ I replied

  

Growing up is kewl man’

  

Yeah growing up is kewl’

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But now if there is a terror threat in the town or some crazy freak blows himself off it doesn’t really matters 😛 you have to reach your work place on time, no matter what. I remember when on 18th October their was a big bomb blast not greatly far from my place and some150 people died, I planned to stay home and watch Kamran Khan whine on GEO (RIP). My dad asked me that what the hell I was doing.

   

I meekly replied, ‘watching Kamran Khan whine’.

  

‘Why aren’t you getting ready for work?’ He asked.

  

Because its dangerous to go out their!’

  

What are you? Some white lady from New York 😛

  Then he asked me to grow some balls and get my ass ready for work. So there I was out in middle, with little or no traffic on the streets of Karachi city, trying to grow some balls on my way to work and reminiscing the good old days when I was a kid and use to get a day off just by acting sick.       

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4 Responses to “Growing old is mandatory, but growing up?”


  1. November 11, 2007 at 11:56 am

    hahhaha how can i forget ur teacher of garde 9 lolz u nver had a crush on ur teacher thn y u wanted to grow old eh:)gd post man u rock growin old really sucks life bcom hell evry day i hate it

  2. November 11, 2007 at 6:05 pm

    i still have nightmares about that encounter 😛

    why i wanted to grow old? the first cartoon explains 😉

    thnaks for your comments beeca

  3. November 11, 2007 at 7:45 pm

    there’s no free lunch dude! u need to pay 4 everything.

  4. October 30, 2010 at 6:37 pm

    i actually googled ‘growing up’ clicked on the first picture of your post and the picture led to your blog post, lool. where are you from? your post was really interesting and funny xD


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R O N I N

A web-blog by another wanna be writer who thinks he can write

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