Archive for December, 2007

31
Dec
07

Hum jo tareek raho mai maray gaye….

Three Prime Ministers, similar fate…

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Tere honton ke phoolon kii chahat mein hum

Daar ki khushk tehni pe waare gaye

Tere haaton ki sham’on ki hasrat mein hum

Neem tareek raahon mein maare gaye

… Qatl-gaahon se chun kar humara alam

Aur nikleinge ushaaq ke qaafle

Jin ke raah-e-talab se humare qadam

Mukhtasar kar chale dard ke faasle

Kar chale jin ki khaatir jahan geer hum

Jaan gunwa kar teri dilbari ka bharam

        

Hum jo tareek raahon mein maare gaye !!

30
Dec
07

Who Killed Bhutto, again??

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Blame Al-Qaeda! How convenient is that? Maybe the next time when the cookie jar will be empty; little Tommy will do the same. Blame Al-Qaeda, Mahsood etc. So who killed Bhutto?

The picture that was taken by ‘some’ amateur photographer explains it all. The man in the glasses is the shooter, as he is holding the gun in the second picture. And in the third picture you can’t see Ms.Bhutto. The third photo was taken seconds before the suicide attack. According to Dawn sources the amateur photographer also pointed out the man in the first picture whose face is half covered and is standing right behind the shooter. He is the suicide bomber.

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In countries where authorities themselves aren’t responsible for suicide killings and mass murdering; evidences are not washed away. The man who killed Liaqat Ali Khan (first PM of Pakistan) was immediately shot by a police inspector without any attempt of arrest. No body saw Zulfiqar Ali Bhuttos dead body, he was buried by men in uniform and then army men sprayed his grave with some solution to put an end for any future investigation. In this case the authorities washed the place with the help of a fire brigade, just few hours after the incident. No fire brigade showed up in any other part of the country where factories, houses, offices, cars and other public property were set on fire.

 

The picture that was published in today’s Dawn proves the fact that it was neither a suicide bomb nor the lever of her car, that killed the ex prime Minister.

 

So why did Pervaiz Musharraf’s (Government) spokes man came up with a phony tale?

For obvious reasons;

 

  • Benazir Bhutto was the most popular leader of Pakistan.
  • Her Prime minister ship could have put a halt on army intervention once and for all.
  • She was a symbol of anti establishment.
  • Establishment can fall to any degree to achieve its targets.

     

     

    If we look at the course of events and how they turned out, it appears to be all scripted. The citizens of the country were forced to live in a war zone. We are all helpless. If the Govt. can’t protect its citizens in emergency situations then what is the need of such a Govt. If you ask me who benefited from Benazir’s death the most? Its Musharraf and establishment, with Benazir in command he saw his end nearer. The only support that he had was from USA and even they found his replacement.

    27
    Dec
    07

    Benazir Bhutto (1953-2007)

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     Former Prime Minister of Pakistan and President of PPP died in a suicide attack. Bhutto was shot first and then the attacker blew himslef up. Protests and violence has erupted on the streets of Pakistan.
    24
    Dec
    07

    Merry Xmas

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    23
    Dec
    07

    Whose the Hitler now??

    How many of you have seen Godzilla? I can still recall the scene where the French spy was distributing weapons and uniforms of the American army among his fellow Frenchmen. He also gave chewing gums to every soldier. So that they appear hip or cool or fly 😛 Yes, that’s what we all have learn from Hollywood. That American action heroes and war veterans are fearless and valiant. Bruce Willis despite being a regular LAPD cop can hunt down international terrorists in the most crucial of the situations and at the same time can be so hip and utter cool dialogues like, ‘Yippi kai yeh’. In this media controlled world that we are living in perception has a wider and unfathomable effect then ground reality.

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    In 2006 a movie by the name ‘Rang De Basanti’ was released in India. The plot revolved around a group of friends and how they transformed in to the characters they were impersonating. Now we all know that Indian ideology revolves around Gandhi. But this film promoted Bhagat Singh’s version of justice. This was not only violent for some but absolutely opposite of the teachings of the peaceful Indian Mahatama. So after the huge success of the movie a new debate started among Indians that what should be the path to follow. Of course hardly anyone in any country follows the teachings of their Prophets, heroes, leaders as much as they claim. But even then they have some ideology which they pretend that they are following. Like every party by the name Muslim League in Pakistan claim that they are the party of the Quaid. (Just for the record there are more then 5 in total.)

     

     

    Coming back to Rang De Basanti; the group of friends in the movie avenges the tragic death of their pilot friend and murders the defense minister (who was involved in the corruption scandal which led to the pilot’s death). This movie raised an imperative question that if someone as influential as a minister is involved in a murder or mass murdering and the system or Judiciary fails to punish that influential criminal then what should be done. Should the Janta, awaam or the people take the law into their own hands and award judgments on the streets?

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    But that was only a movie. Films are there to entertain you and make you feel good. They don’t tell you how to change the course of your lives. They might create an impression though; at the end of every feel good movie everything goes to superfine. The bad guy meets his catastrophic end and the good guys gets justice or the girl next door . But we all know in the real world the bad guy usually wins or goes unharmed. Like in Narrendra Modi’s case he won a phenomenal victory despite the genocide that was carried out under his tree. This is amazing, blame congress and Sonia Gandhi but somebody voted for him and they didn’t care much about the innocent killings.

     

    So the fact remains that how big the crime be, if people like Modi or Bush play their cards well. Everything is possible, I am sure Adolph Hitler must be feeling quite over rated for his sins rite now.

     

    Note: I previously wrote about Modi here

    20
    Dec
    07

    Eid Muabarak

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    Height:  4’3’’

    Weight: 64 Kgs

    Color: Weatish,

    I named him Rawalpindi express. He is my Goat for qurbani (sacrifice) and has a serious attitude problem. When I visited the Bakra Mandi (Barn) this morning I was looking out for a cute fellow in affordable range. When the sales person or Chacha was handing him over to me he advised me to watch out for him because nobody in the past dared to tie him up and he has a bit attitude problem.

    Yeah rite 😛 I told myself. But after few hours people found me running after my Goat (Rawalpindi Express) on the streets. Turns out that  Chacha was right.I hope nobody was filming that. Don’t want to be on youtube for wrong reasons. Eid-ul Azha aka Bekra Eid aka the Big Eid is the event with huge religious importance. It highlights the sacrifices made by Prophet Ibrahim (AS) and his family. And since then we reenact the incident.

     

    I am sure you all of you are aware of the Christmas carol. Well here in Pakistan we have something close to that, like a Bekra Eid carol of our own. After every few hours you will hear the young ones singing and screaming. Guuy Aai Guuy Aai (Here comes the cow, here comes the cow).     

    Speaking of cows; a cow from Pakistan called her sister cow in India for some last minute goodbye.

    Pakistani Cow: How you doing gurl ??

    Indian Cow: never been better 😀

    Pakistani Cow: Hmmm… somebody sounds happy??

    Indian Cow: You bet !! listen to this one, over here in India I am God !

    Pakistani Cow: Get out of here !! you are keeding me right?

    Indian Cow: I swear upon Anjuman (Lollywood Actress) the only cow from our community who made it to the big screens.

    Pakistani Cow: Sigh! You better not be keeding because I am a die heart Anjuman fan.

    Indian Cow: I know that Gurl! And I am telling you I am having a ball here. Feeling all holy and stuff :D. He he he  

    By the way How you doing?? 😉

     Pakisatni Cow: I am pretty popular here too,  I guess. They all seem to be very hospitable. Screaming; Guuy Aai Guuy Aai.  

    Indian Cow: why they haven’t seen a good looking cow before 😛

     I wish everyone on WordPress a wonderful Eid. Especially the vegetarians, who are going to miss the Bar-B-Q parties.

    16
    Dec
    07

    Truck # 11411

     

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    اگر زندگي دنده عقب داشت

    If life had a reverse gear !!

     

    The above picture was taken from Homeyras blog, she was kind enough to translate it for me.

    14
    Dec
    07

    Shaadmani o Shaadmani

    People are getting married this season in Pakistan. For some strange reason people choose to get married in the holiday’s season particularly in December. Why December? Why not the rest of the eleven months, from Jan to November? People don’t divorce each other after looking at the calendar. So why marriage 😛

      Hey honey, I ve decided to divorce you on the 7th of October. What do you say?

      

     Hmmm… I dunno, my aunty who lives in San Francisco won’t be able to attend. How about December?

      

     Honky dory! Now let’s make sweet love  🙂

       

     I hate attending marriages. It’s the most over rated occasion to party. Women with horrible sense of fashion get the opportunity to wear deafening make-up, dazzling clothes and perfumes that have a hefty proportion of saturated chloroform. The married men are there to look after the kids. You weren’t expecting Mama to appear like Madhuri Dixit and running after young Pappo with a feeder at the same time or were you? It’s the responsibility of the Man  😛 

     But no man learns from it. You have seen your uncles, your cousins, then your brothers; you name it. But nobody learns. And after few months of realization they console each other in parties of similar nature. They start by cursing Benazir and Musharraf. Than comes expert scrutiny of the Pakistani cricket team which is followed by;

       

     A:Dude, your loosing hair!

       

     B: Yes, that and loads of green (money).

       

    A: How come?

    B: My friend [Sigh!] when a man decides to get married; he gradually looses every good he has. In contrast his wife gains every bad she has, like weight, weight and loads of weight.   

     A: Which one is your wife by the way?  

    B: You see that big sack of wet clothes on that table near the water cooler.

      A:Yes.  

    B: That thing is my wife.

       

    B: Which one is yours?

       

    A: Can you see that woman in the red dress? Who tried to look like Ashwariya and ended up looking like Abhishek.

       

    B: The one who’s fiercely rubbing that red lipstick on her jaws?

       

    A: Yeah. That’s my better half.

    So the question is what is there for single man? Nothing hot or sexy, I still remember how my dad uses to persuade me to attend these weddings.

      Me: Dad, I have this crucial test tomorrow. I can’t go to some stupid wedding.

      

     Dad: Son, If you are not going to attend their wedding, nobody will be present in yours.

      

     Me: Dad what are you talking about. I am only 12 years old and probably not going to get married in the coming 12 (years).

      

     Dad: Hmmmm…. There will be plenty of free ice cream.

      

     Me: So, when is the wedding again? :O

      

     Yes free meal, its the biggest attraction. You will have this old friend complaining about your absence and the next thing you know he is somewhere near the food stalls, making the pile of items on his plate. But the highlight of any Pakistani wedding is the movie session; where all who are invited get a chance to have a candid session with the bride and the groom. This session is the longest and most exhausting of all. And the poor groom has to wear this fake smile on his face all the time.

       

     Now when I think about marriage ceremonies a line from ‘A Night at the Roxubury’ comes to my mind, where the priest asks Will Farrell if he wants to take this woman as his bride and he bluntly replies;

      ‘I dunno, my father already paid the caterers 😛 ’ 

    13
    Dec
    07

    random musings#11

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    Jeenay kay liye socha hii nahee dard samhaalney hongay….

    Muskara-ey tau, muskaranay kay karz utaarney hongay…

    Muskara-aoo kabhi tau lagta hai… Jaisay hontoo pai karz rekha hai…

    – Gulzar

    12
    Dec
    07

    totally bekwaaasss post,news and views

    Gone are the days when I use to blog about nothing and use to feel pompous about it 🙂 But now I have to think 100 times before writing and the result is no post at all. I still remember the period when I mostly use to write humorous posts. That stage was followed by the politically triggered posts (thanks to political crisis in the country today). And the phase that you are witnessing right now is full of confusion and anger.   

    So I will write or blog about random bekwas stuff and feel good about it.

      I would like to start the post with the boring Indo-Pak series that is taking place in India rite now. Now like any other true Karachiite I hate watching test matches. I find no motive of wasting both time and energy on something that lingers for 5 whole days and results in a draw. Now I know how some of the self commended cricket experts will react on this one. But I will narrate what I saw yesterday. About 11,000 runs on the board and Mr. commentator was complaining about bad conditions for batting 😛  He went on saying and I quote, ‘I don’t like it, I don’t want such kind of a pitch.’ I knew that guy was high 😀 😛 lolz C’mon there is no other explanation fot such a brainless comment. They should also test both commentators and umpires for dope. Because some of them sound and act like real junkies.   

    Talking of cricket and Pakistani cricket specifically, the ex-head of the Parchii Cricket Board aka PCB Retd Gen. Tauqeer Zia has joined the political party PPP and is running for elections on their ticket. According to him the late Zulfi Bhutto was his ideal back when he was a young cadet in the army. Yes the same army who hung Bhutto for the reason which is irrelevant to discuss here. Tauqeer Zia was the core commander of Mangla and was quite close to the President retd. Gen Musahrraf. His addition to PPP suggests something. Go figure!

       

    In other news Bourne trilogy starrer Matt Daemon! Is the new Peoples Magazine sexiest Men on earth. Who cares 😛 I know but still Matt Daemon, I mean c’mon kids Matt Daemon???!  My goat for the big eid is sexier then him. But I guess, it’s not as bad as illegally being the President and Army Chief at the same time. Does it ring a bell?

      

    Last but not the least the country that can not be named in Tel-Aviv ie Iran is in news again and this time they founded ‘em clean. Yes they declare that Iran might not be enriching uranium for nuke purposes. This concludes that they might not be attacking Iran in 2008 as well. So if Iran is out of the list for a while. so who might be  the next target?

      What? Why the hell you’re looking at me 😛   

          

    11
    Dec
    07

    Tagged!! You have the right to remain weird…

    I was tagged by my  blogger friend Leila some time back. And according to the rules of this tag; I am suppose to share some 7 perfectly normal attributes about my personality  that might be unusual or weird for few. They are:   

    1)  I hate rain. Yes the one that many of you out their find romantic for unknown reasons 😛 I despise the rainy season for many good causes. It gets all muddy, we Karachiites face power failures for hours, traffic jams, you get stuck where ever you are and can’t move freely when you want. And the biggest reason of all is; rain is quite unlucky for me 😛

    2) I like to watch slow, boring, reality based drama films. Yes the independent films those big studios reject for commercial value, I love to watch them especially if they are in foreign languages and with subtitles.  

    3) I have a whole 20 minute tooth brushing session every morning. I watch early morning news on the tele, checkout the world from my terrace, choose the outfit I am going to wear, check my inbox out while brushing teeth.

     4) I use to change my hair styles after every two or three weeks. I had a pony tail once, one morning I decided to go bald, had almost every variety of hair-do’s and goatees. This thing is quite under control now since I have entered my professional life 😛   

    5) I am in love with water, ocean, sea, swimming pool 😛  

    6) I am afraid of heights. In other words I am alto phobic 😛   

    7) I hate Chinese food, hate it , really really hate it. I dunno what people like about it 😛

    05
    Dec
    07

    Groovy 5

    Music is a huge part of my life like many others. But what makes it special is the quality of music that I listen to. I have found people enjoying Himesh and Abrar’s music, which make me even more proud of my taste for music 😛 

     If we talk about Rock music the genre of rock that I especially admire is classic rock. The groovy era of 60’s and 70’s I wish I was there at that time to enjoy the magnificent amount of music which was created in that small period of time. So all those rock lovers sit back and get ready to go on a roller coaster ride to the era of the classic. People with little or no taste for good music are also welcome, I hope you will develop some taste on the way 😛

    • The Beatles – Twist and Shout

    • Jimi Hendrix –  Foxy Lady at Rainbow Bridge

    • The Doors: Light My Fire: Ed Sullivan

    • Pink Floyd the wall  – Another Brick in The Wall

    • Bob Dylan – Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door
    03
    Dec
    07

    I(am) do(ing it) …

     

     

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    Pastor: Will you take her as your wife?
    Will you love her all your life?

    Groom: Yes, I take her as my wife,
    Yes, I’ll love her all my life.

     

    Pastor: Will you have, and also hold
    Just as you have at this time told?

     

    Groom: Yes, I will have, and I will hold,
    Just as I have at this time told,
    Yes, I will love her all my life
    As I now take her as my wife.

    01
    Dec
    07

    Irony

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    Can you recall the instant when you saw a couple that hold this particular attribute; some stunning-looking gorgeous woman with a short heightened, bald guy who also carries an accentuated tummy?  

    Now if you have ever been to Pakistan then I am afraid you have seen more than a few couples that hold such resemblance. I have little or no issues with men of such appearances; trust me but when you see this guy with a real hottie you ask yourself, the how, the when, the who, the what? 😛 In other words you ask yourself  that how the fuck did that happen’  I know you people are nodding in endorsement  😛 we all have asked this question to our self quite a few times in our lives. One can’t help it; we all are bunch of judgmental freaks.   

    We all inquire our logic; all the left brained, the right-brained and with little or no brains (Mullas). But we all fail to answer this fundamental question that how the hell she ended up with him. Now being a proud member of the Men community 😛 I am aware of the fact that no matter how unappealing we appear in front of the mirror we all are under this false impression, ie we stand a chance with every hot girl in the town. No I am not exaggerating and which means your 10 year old cousin believes that he has a chance with Jessica Alba. Like your Uncle Sam once had this funny feeling that Julia Roberts will have no issues settling down with a guy who lives in Gulshan-e-Iqbal, Karachi. Its not Noting Hill uncle Sam 😛 !! 

     Now we men aren’t the only one that takes pleasure in day dreaming. I bear in mind the time when Imran-opposition-Khan decided to utter ‘I do!’ with a 21 year old Jemima Khan. News papers boiled with the grievances of both national and international celebs who thought they had a shot with the ex Pakistani skipper. But quite usually hot women realize and settle down with average Joes for “justifiable reasons”, now those reasons comes with Quad-e-Azam Muhamemd Ali Jinnahs pic in the backdrop. You can do your mathematics if you don’t live in Pakistan.  

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     Money can’t buy happiness (the most pathetic cliché ever) but it can buy diamonds and diamonds are women’s best friend (remember that). So everything equated to money in the end, how foreseeable 😛  Pakistani politicians looted the country with the slogan of Roti Kapra Makaan ( Bread, Cloth, House) I think they should come out of the closet and present a new slogan to the people of this country which is Get rich or die trying !!




    R O N I N

    A web-blog by another wanna be writer who thinks he can write

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